Wednesday, March 23rd, 2011 :: 1:59 PM

“I sip my drink. Beth and Dawn chug down their mojitos and order another round. I think all servers drink their first postshift drink quickly. A waiter’s first drink is medicinal, his second is relaxing, but his third is anesthesia.

” ‘So you got ’em?’ Beth says to Dawn, her voice dropping to a whisper.’
“Dawn fumbles in her purse and pulls out a medicine bottle.
” ‘What’s that?’ I ask
” ‘Xanax,’ Dawn says.
” ‘You’re not gonna take that now, are you?’ I say.
” ‘What are you,’ Dawn says, ‘my father?’
” ‘Xanax and mojitos don’t mix.’
” ‘I have a perscription.’

“Beth and Dawn take their pills and wash them down with a rum and mint chaser. In a few minutes the drugs will kick in and they’ll forget their own names. I’ve seen it happen before.

“I shake my head and look down at my martini. It’s still half full. I take another sip. The best advice I ever got about drinking was from my grandfather. ‘Drink till you’re mellow,’ he’d say. ‘After that it’s all downhill.’ ” (>>)

Friday, April 17th, 2009 :: 1:00 PM

“Whenever the devil harasses you, seek the company of men or drink more, or joke and talk nonsense, or do some other merry thing. Sometimes we must drink more, sport, recreate ourselves, and even sin a little to spite the devil, so that we leave him no place for troubling our consciences with trifles. We are conquered if we try too conscientiously not to sin at all. So when the devil says to you: do not drink, answer him: I will drink, and right freely, just because you tell me not to.” (>>)

Tuesday, February 13th, 2007 :: 3:56 PM
Big Plans

“So, Ian, you have any big plans for Valentine’s Day?”

“Oh, yes, big plans. Big, big plans. Very b… no.”


“I’ll probably just do the same thing I do every year.”

“What’s that?”

“You know, put on some Hank Williams, drink myself into a coma…”


“But, actually, I figured this year I might try something different.”

“Oh yeah? That’s great! What are you going to do this year?”

“Well, I figure if I start drinking the day before, then I can just sleep through the whole contrived farce altogether.”

“Oh. That’s, uh, very… creative.”

“Thanks, I like to consider myself a free-thinker.”

Friday, June 16th, 2006 :: 9:51 PM

“The teetotaling culture of the Bible Belt American south is not a dependable guide to what scripture teaches. It is a culture that has taught millions to be ashamed of a glass of wine, a dance at the prom or a Sunday night baseball game. These are matters over which there should be no shame, and about which there should be no ‘binding of the conscience.’ ” (>>)

Thursday, June 8th, 2006 :: 11:28 PM

“…watching TV in his underwear, his empty living room illuminated by the flickering light of a cathode ray tube, his eyes glinting with a sad alcoholic sheen as they gaze into the prison of memory.” (>>)

Monday, February 13th, 2006 :: 10:47 PM

“…if we are working out our salvation through being redeemed and redeeming, then our response to cultural abuses is not to abstain but to redeem. That not only pushes us to maturity by teaching us how to eat, drink, and have sex to the glory of God (though it won’t come easy), but it is also a witness to the world that God redeems. The pervert throws away the pornography (abuse) and learns to love sex with his wife (redemption). The glutton refuses to order a 5 piece fried chicken and fries meal (abuse) and learns to order a salad with light dressing instead (redemption). The alcohol abuser stops drinking until drunk (abuse) and learns to stop after a beer or two (redemption). ” (>>)

Saturday, September 24th, 2005 :: 8:45 AM

“I was lied to, and I am tired of being lied to.” (>>)

Saturday, February 19th, 2005 :: 9:02 AM

“Even permissive Christians seem scared to drink a substantial amount of it. ‘It’s okay, every now and then, to have a glass of wine at dinner.’ I’m sorry. I find that sentiment lacking. It lacks a certain boldness. There is always a risk in pleasure. In sex, a man may be lacking in selflessness from time to time, yet he should not abstain for that reason. In business, one may give way to greed every now and again (or perhaps often), yet that is hardly reason to abstain from running a store. Boldness is heavily correlated with certainty, and that is precisely why the Church I know is so modest, so unoffensive, so… conservative.” (>>)

Saturday, February 19th, 2005 :: 9:01 AM

“The evenings were spent sitting on the porch reading or talking or just looking at the big, big sky. And no one knew what ‘boredom’ meant. They were all too tired from the work each day. He had to move to the city before he ever understood angst and ennui and alcoholism and drug addiction and depression and suicide.” (>>)

Wednesday, February 9th, 2005 :: 6:06 PM

“I realized after writing and recording this record that there’s not a second of it that’s not about relationships. Relationships with women and girls, relationships with drugs and alcohol, relationships with family, relationships with God, a relationship with the road, and a relationship with myself. Whether relationships are past, present or future they always seem to shape who we have been, who we are and who we are becoming. I have lived and am living for all of those relationships and somehow collectively find my meaning, identity, and purpose within them.”

Wednesday, October 6th, 2004 :: 11:54 PM

“It is the self-righteous person who takes pride in abstaining from that which is not evil. I might as well take Christian pride in an abstinence from eating peanuts – for they are the moral equivalent of a beer. And with self-righteousness, comes a haughtiness with which he of the ignorant conscience actually comes to look down on those of stronger faith, those whose consciences do not bind them in the same manner.” (>>)

Saturday, September 11th, 2004 :: 9:37 AM

“Jesus can’t help me — maybe I can find the answer in beer!” (>>)

Tuesday, August 17th, 2004 :: 1:26 PM

“One missed step can make you stumble,
you set yourself up for a fall.
You punish yourself for each failure,
dogma beat out alcohol.
When all of your principles were fashioned,
you thought your new rules made you new.
But maybe those X’s on your hands,
are what’s killing you.” (>>)

Sunday, July 25th, 2004 :: 11:13 PM

The Proverbs 31 Approach to Broken Hearts:

“Give beer to those who are perishing,
wine to those who are in anguish;
let them drink and forget their poverty
and remember their misery no more.”




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